Notes on love, uncertainty, and living without a script

Essays

standing at the lake, evoking honest relationship coaching, by Victoria Onken.

What Are People Actually Paying For?

May 15, 2026

Reflection

Abstract green leaf twisting into soft loops, illustrating when freedom becomes avoidance, by Victoria Onken

When freedom starts to feel like avoidance

April 22, 2026

Reflection

Quiet morning still life evoking emotional fatigue and consent in open relationships, by Victoria Onken

We agreed to this. So why did it still hurt?

February 3, 2026

Reflection

@2026 victoria onken
brand + website by i know a gal

Victoria Onken is a relationship coach helping individuals and couples navigate consensual non-monogamy, open relationships, and complex relationship transitions with clarity, care, and thoughtful support.

Based in amsterdam
coaching worldwide online
open to travel for live events

Essays

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What Are People Actually Paying For?

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When freedom starts to feel like avoidance

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We agreed to this. So why did it still hurt?